Monday

I would imagine I'm part of the majority of people who hate Monday. I hate sending my husband to work after a short weekend of seeing him. I hate the mess that the weekend leaves for me to clean. I hate the two day break and trying to talk myself into going to the gym. I just can't stand it!


Parts of Monday I suppose can be good. Brand new week and new choices and adventures. New weekends coming to spend time with my husband. A lot of new with each Monday. After my break down yesterday I think something new is good. I've talked with many ladies who are very encouraging and trying to ease my mind. They are all urging us that we should continue trying and that we will have another baby. I'm not sure if I'm ready for that, but maybe I can begin getting ready. My main goal at this point is to lose the weight that I have gained moving across the country and having my last baby, a whopping 120lbs!


Yes you read that right I need to lose 120lbs! I am at the highest weight I have ever been in my entire life, and I hate every moment of this fat suit. I need to get rid of it. And while I've been trying to lose it, I've not done anything extreme or serious and in the last 3 months I've lost a tiny 6lbs. Its down to business! I have to do this! For my husband, I want to be the sexy young woman he married almost 5 years ago. For my daughter I want to be the mom who has energy that never ends and can out run her (hehehehe). For me, I want to feel beautiful again, I don't want to feel like I can't take a picture of myself because I disgust myself. I don't want to lose out on anything. Especially if I don't get another chance to have a baby I don't want to lose out.


So here is goes, this will be day one! My final goal is 180lbs, still a lot by normal standards, but for me I'm a size 11 at that weight (and not I'm not tall only 5'6"). I am at my last weigh in Friday 303lbs...HUGE! But now its not a secret and I have to get rid of it!....now to begin Monday....